Archive for September, 2006


Confessions Of a Pre-Sehri Snack-o-holic


BlogThought of the Day: If I Could, I Would…

… be content with my lot as it is. I would find solace in my pain, comfort in my loss, victory in bitter defeat and that hidden sparkle of joy within a tear…

… have my 2 words to say and they would be glorious, profound and meaningful in their simplicity and truth…

… be marooned on an island with books upon shelves of books and be the happiest person in the world…

… have the courage to walk away from a fight…

… fly as high and as far as my thoughts can go…

… travel the world and yet, always return home…

… choose to live my life as I have already done…

… always be ME, as I choose to be!


Go in Peace

….It is the fate of a woman
Long to be patient and silent, to wait like a ghost that is speechless,
Till some questioning voice dissolves the spell of its silence…
The Courtship of Miles Standish; Priscilla (Part vi)

– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow –

For ‘M’, from the well thumbed pages of her own journal;
May the next world be kinder to you than this one has been. Go in peace my friend!
‘M’ passed away last night in her sleep. More than the sadness of her death, I feel for the fact that death came to her after she had in such a long time decided to live.

Thus is the fickle nature of life…

There is no death! What seems so is transition;
This life of mortal breath
Is but a suburb of the life elysian,
Whose portal we call Death.
Resignation – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Lights Out

Who knew that this could happen in Islamabad? I mean, sure it is expected in the rest of Pakistan but in the city miles away from the country depite being the capital? According to Reuters, Pakistan has been hit by worst power outage in history because of a technical fault at Tarbela.
No lights, computers, fans, or music systems for the better part of 5 hours… In relative terms, it also meant a few peaceful hours of slumber because the construction and drilling at the house behind my window was stunned into silence as well. Thank heavens for small mercies in that it was not an unpleasantly warm day, and I was able to fall dead to the world in my room without trying to compete for a world record for the most tosses and turns in bed.
Just browsing, have caught some info on the ongoing power crash on APP and Pakistan Times
More on it as and when I get the time… For the moment, am hungry….

Ramadan Kareem

It’s that time of the year again! I love Ramadan… There is this inherent feeling of peace and restfulness in my home and more relevantly within myself at the advent of this month and all the more appreciated because of the rock n roll routine that my life is these days.

Ramadan has always been a special time in our home. Some of my oldest memories go back to the scent of parathas wafting from the kitchen and filling the cold, winter of our home and then, later sneaking into my parents’ room and snuggling into my papa’s quilt as he recited the Quran and slipping back into snooze land with the sound of his voice still in my mind.

For someone like me, who enjoys food and everything to do with it, taking everything from the ingredients, to the flavors, the smells, the textures as a separate add-on experience to eating, Ramadan would seem tougher than normal, having to abstain from that which I enjoy so much. On the contrary, and much to my surprise, I find my senses heightened because of this halt. I enjoy the whole experience more. It makes the scents and taste a more physical, and hence, more real sensation than when I eat normally. There is something ‘more’ about eating after the fast or knowing that you won’t be eating till sundown that makes the tea seem warmer, the milk milkier and the melting comfort of my mama’s parathas even more meltingly comforting.

You can safely assume from the fact that I’ve mentioned parathas twice in 2 paragraphs that I have a thing about my mama’s parathas. My mama is an amazing cook, all mothers are but it’s my mama’s parathas that I live and breathe for. I have never quite seen anyone’s parathas come out as evenly golden brown as hers do. She does something to them, the top most layer is fried to a gleaming light brown and steams and releases the most yummy smell of butter or ghee, and it just feels like the ultimate in comfort food and then you break off the first piece, and it takes just 3 fingers, and from you can see layers inside, soft and flaky and melty in the mouth….

But Ramadan is not just about the parathas for me although it is an important part; it is also about the prayers. For someone like me, who manages to most shamefully excuse herself from prayers every now and then, it is a chance to make up for it and get into a habit of doing so regularly with the kind of faith and commitment she’s supposed to. It may be considered hypocrisy by some, but I believe even a month of proper regular prayers along with habitual recitation of the Quran or any other miscellaneous duas or a’maal that bring me some hope of improvement and allow me to feel the peace of knowing that the Almighty still deems me worthy of occasionally showing me the right path which I can follow whether through compulsion of a specific month or time or whether through some sense of knowing that I need to come this way. At least it leaves me the hope that I can turn myself to know and follow that which is right and Insha’Allah some day soon will have the strength within me to follow on all my days and not just maah-e-sayyam. (Ameen)

May this month bring all Muslims the faith and fortitude to follow the practices as deemed by our religion and bring us all peace and tranquility in our lives and our nation in the form of uncountable blessings from the Almighty Allah and may our practices in this month serve to bring us forgiveness and mercy in this world and the hereafter. (Ameen)


Blogword of the Day: Words

“…I once loved a maid and would have offered her everything I had. But I forgot to offer her my heart first and last. Forgot to give her the words.

Words are important to everyone. When they are not said, they leave holes.” Deep, dark holes where doubts and failures breed.

… He turned over an elegant hand, and mounded in it was the blinding brilliance of diamonds and sapphires, the aching gleam of creamy pearls.

“Would you take them as they’re offered from the man who knows he holds your heart, or would you rather the words?”

She said the first thing that came into her head, because it seemed the only thing.

“What are the words?”

And he sighed, long and deep, his proud shoulders slumping, his eyes going soft and sad.

“So it’s true then, they matter so much. And these… Are nothing but pride.”

– Jewels of the Sun – Nora Roberts –


I’m IT! FINALLY been Tagged!!

Ooohhhh!! First tag ever by in2deep… even though us poor souls were not quite sure what it meant… 🙂

Am thinking about…
all the work that i have to do for my research

I said…
I will not forgive him and I won’t

I want to…
be free

I wish…
I could see the world as I used to when I was younger

I miss…
being able to take things at face value

I hear…
myself being thankless so many times during the day

I wonder…
why it takes a few words of love for a reasonably intelligent female to lose it!

I regret…
the time that i wasted on thinking what could have been

I am…
still finding out what it means to be me

I dance…
when it rains, when the moon is out, when i am pissed off… (I like dancing… i guess :p)

I sing…
loud and clear in the privacy of my room!

I cry…
when I pray.. and when I don’t

I am not always…
the easiest person to get along with.

I write…
words that always take more from me than I want to give.

I confuse…
people who want me to fit into a pre-defined slot!

I need…
my space

I should try…
to be a little more restive

I finish…
with a flourish!


At my end, I tag, oh gee… hmmmm i don’t know too many bloggers… Checkmate, Inspirex, and Olive and Untamed-Desires, Sheza and Saad? You’ve been tagged!

September 2006